

You are deficient in all that lends character.

You would watch test patterns all day if the other inmates would let you. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle. Bach is the greatest composer who ever lived. You think that is the name of a rock band. Your mother had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with you. You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent. You are a loathsome disease, a drooling inbred cross-eyed toesucker. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. The good news is that no normal human would ever mate with you, so we won't have to go into the sewers in search of your git. We need to trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order to cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. Do you fantasize that your tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001 worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big W.O.M.B.A.T., and your future doesn't look promising either. You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.ĭo you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be read? Everyone plonked you long ago. You have a couple of address lines shorted together. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup doesn't validate. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, hairy-livered, goisher kopf, inbred trout-defiler. You are the entropy which will claim us all. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in the slough of despair. God created houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos, fleas, ticks, slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered his standards and made you.
#THE WEIRD SISTERS BAGPIPE PLAYER FULL#
You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short of a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few chromosomes short of a full human. I have seen skeet with more sense than you have. If cluelessness were crude oil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it ever so much more rapidly. Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. Your alleged parents abandoned you at birth and then died of shame in recognition of what they had done to an unsuspecting world. You didn't crawl out of a normal egg, either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist as being below his low standards. You were hatched into an unwilling world that rejects the likes of you. You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe player. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. I take that back you are a festering pustule on a weasel's rump. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You took your last vacation in the Islets of Langerhans. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. As we say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions printed on the heel.
